What Women Want? A true story.... by Malcolm Vex (35 and a bit)

I met this woman on face-pic and we exchanged emails. What follows is a transcript of our 2nd conversation (our first being a casual, 'hi how are you doing?' kinda vibe). I took the slight mickey out of her because of her fastness (and because I am wicked and bad, and idle and will one day go to hell - lol). Enjoy!!

emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com just sent you a nudge.

emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
hello
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
hello u.
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
how are u doing today
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
am ok!!
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
can we talk now?
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
go for it!
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
i have really miss u
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
have ya. that's nice.
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
ok
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
and how is work doing
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
work is doing fine. how are you?
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
and your lifl there
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
cool
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
great. fandabbydoozie!
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
is jes i have a lit promble
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
Oh no!!! WHAT???
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
but i feel sham to tall u my love
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
Pray tell.
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
can u promiss that u will help me whan i tall u?
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
I dunno. am a wonderful man. i help everyone!
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
ok
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
is that me internet lines has discanated
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
and need to pay befor they can raconated it for me

emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com just sent you a nudge.

emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
are u there
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
OH NO!!! That's horrible.
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
so i need some money for that
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
and u are the onle one i have now
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
pls help me

emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com just sent you a nudge.

s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says::
let me get this straight... U can't poo?
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
oh why ?
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
Pooo u can't poo poo?
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
u r asking me to help you poo?????
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
yes my love
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
Is it a big poo??? or a little poo?
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
i know is big poo
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
but mt love try and help me
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
U want me to help you with the poo.
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
yes my love
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
is it pretty stinky your poo?
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
why are u saying that to me ?
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
pls i know u can help me
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
pls
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
with your big poo?
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
any of them pls
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
with any of your poos?
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
i need 150 dorrs
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
you want me to help u with 150 big poos?
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
big, stinky poos?
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
U like poos then?
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
love what is the maening of poos

emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com just sent you a nudge.

emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com just sent you a nudge.

emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
love now u can send the 150$
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
Poo? you know poo....
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
pounds or euro
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
150 pounds
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says::
NO. Poo.
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
ok send it
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
will u
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
u want me to send to you my poo?
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
yes love
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
if u want
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
and when will u send it
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
My poo is all for you!!
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
luv pl z try explane the mean of poo
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
It's what comes out of your bottom. poo.
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
love is poo mean to deficate
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
so love u are the only one GOd has chose to me plz help me
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
ok
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
yes
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
i need to paid my inter net bell
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
wo they will desconet it
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
plz
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
friday
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
poo is to defecate...
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
is love
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
plz go to google
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
ok
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
u will find the meand
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
I can't send my poo by google.
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
it might be runny.
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
love i need the money on western union money transfer
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
on thursday
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
MONEY???? You want me for money?????
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
but i will go th bank on friday
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
yes
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
love
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
u know my internet bill
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
or they will desconet it
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
plz love try u best ok
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
Oh, i thought u were interested in my poo. U lied. I thought u loved my poo. all brown and runny.
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
Love me. love my poo.
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
love plz if u send frist i will
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
love the poo
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
love if u love me will not give poo to u lover
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
will u eat my poo?
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
no love
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
i see plz send it
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
frist
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
love my time ids up see tomoro ok
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
try and send it
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
ok. i will send poo tomorrow!! Bye.
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
the money my mail me
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
bye
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
bye love
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
have a good day
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
have a good poo.
s****and_y*****@hotmail.co.uk says:
Bye
emelia_addae2000@yahoo.com says:
(L)(L)(L)

Yes, I took the pee (or poo) slightly... but come on!!! How can you ask a complete stranger for money??? WTF??? Anyhoo... for anyone out there? Feel free to send poo to Miss Emelia... it might help her internet reconnection!!!

Never Yours,


Malcolm Vex (The Vexorcist)